2020. It has been one heck of a year! And to be quite honest, I am VERY ready for this year to end, because I think a lot of us believed that this would be THE year. THE year to crush our goals. THE year to get that dream job. THE year to truly find ourselves. THE year to enjoy our last taste of college before the real world. However, the year 2020 had different plans in mind. From being in quarantine and learning to navigate our new world to addressing racial inequalities to maybe feeling more anxious and worried then we ever expected, this year has been challenging...to say the least (and to be honest, I would use a much harsher term but hey let’s keep it PG friends!).
So, how the heck can we move forward after experiencing this type of year? How can we create space for ourselves to grow, to pick up the broken pieces of 2020 and turn this next year into something meaningful?
Since the New Year is rapidly approaching, I have been thinking about New Year’s Resolutions. During this season, many of us are not only thankful for family and friends and are looking forward to spreading as much holiday cheer as we can because, we know, we need it! But in addition to all of this, we are also beginning to think about our upcoming resolutions or promises we want to make to ourselves for the upcoming year. We ask ourselves: what can I work on about myself so that I can feel better? Oftentimes these resolutions or changes are about jobs. “If I make partner this next year, I will be happier.” Or changes about our finances. “If I make more money, I will be happier, I know it.” Or even changes about our body weight and/or shape. “If I just lose weight, by going to the gym everyday I will be happier with myself.” What if this year, in the spirit of a very unique year past, you do something a little different.
Take a step back and truly reflect. Focus on yourself and take a deep breath. This year has been hard. Ask yourself this question:
Do you think that your New Year’s resolution can potentially be centered around your own mental health wellbeing? Do you think that is something that you need? Instead of changing yourself physically or externally, can you focus on supporting yourself mental and emotionally?
If the answer to any of these questions is yes, I invite you to take the next step. I encourage you to focus on your mental health, especially because of the year we’ve had. By shedding light on your own mental health and addressing the problems you may have been experiencing can actually create a positive domino effect in other aspects of your life or with other goals that you may have!
So, I invite you to glance over some of these ideas that you can potentially think about achieving over the next year- resolutions (or New Year’s intentions!) that extend into the mental health realm!
1. If you are experiencing some mental health issues such as anxiety, depression and/or disordered eating habits, maybe a resolution to work on it over the upcoming year is right for you! I totally get it, acknowledging your mental health issues might be scary because there is still a stigma associated with seeking out help. But, I am here to tell you that seeking out help and sorting through your wounded parts and emotions is such a healthy thing to do. You truly can heal and liberate those parts of yourself and finally feel a sense of freedom!
2. Think about making a resolution to carve out some daily ‘you time.’ Commit to shutting down for 5 or 10 minutes a day to do something for yourself. Maybe put your phone on do not disturb and stand outside in the sun. Perhaps you light a candle and sit with yourself. Maybe, do a face mask. Whatever it may be, it is important to make an effort to rest and recharge yourself mentally and emotionally daily (screen-free!).
3. Learning to relax and enjoy the present moment. Check in with yourself. Are you fully present in what you are doing? Or are you multitasking too much? Maybe it is time to make an effort to simply enjoy the one task that you are doing, because it is very important and multitasking tires out our brain.. We all live in a high stress and fast paced world, so consider making a commitment to yourself to practice being in the present moment and living in the here and now. Enjoy what life has to offer in each moment!
4. Treating yourself with more respect by speaking nicely about yourself! It is time to change the ways in which we talk about ourselves. We are all pretty awesome and we need to acknowledge that! The ways in which we speak about ourselves truly does affect us as well as those around us. When you speak kindly about yourself, it reduces stress and anxiety AND you’re also giving others the freedom to do the same!
5. Remember to give yourself some grace during this new season of working on your mental health or just in general! You are only human, doing the best that you can! It is okay to make mistakes and miss goals. It is just important that you keep moving forward in your journey to wellness, and rest when you need it.
6. Learning how to respond instead of react to situations. Focus on your emotion(s) and ask yourself, what can I do in this moment to make it better? Rather than allowing your anger part to take over the driver seat of your emotions, take that necessary step back and allow your Self to be the driver. Then, maybe you can express your anger in a non-reactive way or maybe you feel something different then anger and can better move forward by feeling the actual emotion triggered.
8. Lastly, strive to embrace your life exactly as it is in the New Year by giving yourself grace! Life is a journey that is complicated and challenging. And we have certainly seen that through this year. But you know what, that is okay. It is okay if we did not become what we wanted or achieve what we wanted this year. Hey, I did not expect to be completing my masters program online in my childhood bedroom, but this is life. It is not what I wanted, but it is the deck I was handed and it has not defined me. So, remember that life is a journey full of adventures and we need to embrace the ride, even if we did not expect it to be this way!
When I think of the year 2020, I think of this season of the Bachelorette (hey, I gotta get through this year somehow!) because as Chris Harrison has said “this season has never before been seen.” And truly this season of life has not been seen by any of us! So, while going into the year 2021 might be scary, because we really do not know what to expect in the next upcoming 12 months, I encourage you to check in with yourself. Seek help if you need it! Or if any of these potential mental health resolutions really speak to you maybe consider seeing a therapist this year!
