It wasn’t until I got in my steamy hot shower during day five of my self-quarantine in my Philadelphia apartment that the importance of self-care actually hit me.
Over the last few months, the importance of self-care has literally been drilled into my head. Being a graduate level mental health counseling student, means that I should be taking self-care “seriously.” But, let me be dead honest, like most of you, I did not believe in this so-called “self-care” or putting myself first. I didn't do it in college, so why should I do it in grad school?
I would often hear my professors say “take care of yourself” or “know your limits, so you don’t burn out!” While I understood what they were saying and I wanted to heed their warnings, it truly just went in one ear and out the next. Whoops, sorry guys, I hope you are not reading this! But ever since I forced myself into quarantine, I have been reflecting on this deeply. Maybe self-care was something I really needed to work on...
First, I thought about my typical Type A personality and boy...am I very type A, seriously I could be the poster child plastered across multiple Philly billboards. I am extremely organized, ambitious, proactive, outgoing, and love to stick to my daily schedule (seriously, ever since this self-quarantine, this has been driving me crazy). But I am also rigid, anxious, sometimes impatient, and a workaholic.
So, thinking about all of these type A personality traits that I possess, I began to think...how am I of all people supposed to integrate self-care into my daily life or week for that matter? Is this something I can really do?
Now do not get me wrong, I have attempted multiple times (and failed) at implementing self-care into my life. Sure! I love hot yoga and while I try to go when I can, I often felt “guilty” for taking this hour for myself. Why do I deserve this hour of “me” time? Especially when I could be doing a number of more “important” things with my time like cooking, school work, or internship duties. So, I again pushed my self-care to the back burner and bought, what I thought at the time, the more important things to the front burner to boil. My type A self dove into my workaholic, organized, and ambitious tendencies and ignored what I actually needed because, like most of us, I believed that I “didn't need it.”
However, ever since I entered my self-quarantine, I have had a lot...I mean a lot of time on my hands. So, instead of doing something, I stopped doing something...AKA reorganizing my closet for the tenth time. *Gasp* How could I do such a thing? Well, I am actually so glad that I did. I have finally been engaging in self-care and it surprisingly does not feel like a chore, nor do I feel bad about it. I am actually enjoying it and everyday, I have been looking forward to my “me” time.
I have come to realize that self-care is truly essential.
It is not something that I should feel bad about or something that I should ignore. It really is something I need. It is ok to take ten, fifteen, or even a full hour and dedicate that time to me. And yes, *sigh* my professors were right, as always. Self-care is something that you can begin to practice too, if you so choose to do so! So, instead of worrying about finishing that essay for school or the paperwork that should have been done for work, that is not, or entertaining your children that might be driving you a little crazy (bless their hearts). Stop. Put it all down. Engage in self-care.
Maybe you want to take a longer bath or just a bath in general for that matter, do it! Maybe you want to read a few chapters of that book that you bought months ago, hey, that is all you! Perhaps you want to mediate or practice yoga. Or, maybe you just want to watch the next episode of Grey’s Anatomy, because trust me I know I am dying to see what Meredith will do next. Whatever it is, take that time, you deserve it!
It may mean you have to say no to someone or something, but please remember, self-care is important, as it makes us stronger, more connected to the world and the ones that we love.
And, although we all miss being outside and walking around busy Rittenhouse Square or strolling through the Gayborhood, we can use this self-quarantine time as a time to engage in some much needed self-care. Because, I know I am.
Julia Salerno,
Villanova Graduate Student
Julia Salerno is a graduate intern at Spilove Psychotherapy and is working toward her Masters in Mental Health Counseling from Villanova University. Julia received her bachelor’s degree in Interdisciplinary Health Services with minors in Psychology and Health Care Ethics from Saint Joseph’s University in 2019. Julia strives to create a warm, comforting, and safe environment for her clients to share their story with her. Julia utilizes both Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Dialect Behavioral Therapy (DBT) when working with clients. She enjoys working with adults and the geriatric population. Julia believes that the cornerstone of therapy is taking the necessary time to build and nurture the client-therapist relationship, as doing so allows for clients to feel a sense of trust.